Monthly Archives: February 2012

Battle of Bri’s Bane: ascending Greenslopes

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New recruits queue near the tombstones.

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Battle of Bri’s Bane Epic Trilogy Poem 1

Dead men tell no tales
only the competitive fails
in war there is no sport
to survivors the lesson is taught.

We had not long assembled
before Greenslopes trembled
as balls of fire landed at will
shot from high on Cannon Hill.

Our allies the Woolloongabba
met their Waterloo like Abba
falling in multiple millions
history’s cannon fodder minions.

The COG commandos led the counter-attack
up Greenslopes watching each other’s back
chinchillas, dogs, humans, wombats and hats
above us flew eagles, dolphins and bats.

Yes, I did say dolphins above us
for a spirit appeared without fuss
and I’ m sure it was Kalbarri Barry
riding the sky waves with his family.

Journey To Bri’s Bane Greenslopes without Ropes

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English: View of Indooroopilly from Mount Coot...

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Three hours after leaving Chinchilla we received word that a rockfall had blocked the tunnel. Colin and Ollie were informed, and soon raced ahead to clear the way. Their colliering skills meant we surfaced at The Gap on schedule. The sun was reaching its apex as the COG led us into the daylight of our destiny. I had faded to grey, and felt comfortable that way.

Emily and Brian led the COG commandos at the head of our line; I had never seen such courage from a pair of hats. Although they shone with a golden hue when first meeting again, nobody could accuse them of being yella in a cowardly way.

Talking of yellow, I was missing Emily not being on my head, with the scorching sun sizzling my sight and cooking my cranium! It was a relief when we reached some tree cover.

We covertly met a covert of coots in the Mount Coot-Tha forest, and they led us over the hill. We continued east to rendezvous with a python called Pilly, and it showed us a short-cut through a secret door at Indooroopilly.

Arriving at Greenslopes for the Battle of Bri’s bane

Emerging through the outdoor, a river lay below us. Churchilla said it was Bri’s bane’s main defensive line. I couldn’t imagine how all the furry little chinchillas were going to cross the river, but I was in for another nice surprise.

When we arrived at the river, more of my West Coast friends were in it: Winona, Walter, Wendy, William and Dweezil whale sharks; and Dolly the Dolphin. Moreover, there was also a big boat moored there, and who should be skippering it but Captain Dec O’ Rum. I asked where Dai ‘on the Seas’ was. Dec said he was doing fine, and had gone into town looking for wine and women.

It was a magnificent morale booster to see them all again, and a renewed confidence surged through me. After hugs and greetings, they helped us cross the river.

Although it was a relief that we’d all traversed the water safely, arriving on the other side felt like being on the sharp end of a double-edged sword; because we were now at the foot of Greenslopes, with battalions of Bri’s bane protecting  the peak.

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Marc Latham:

Northern lights and cloud create greenygreyness.

Originally posted on Chez Louis:

No lights during the night which was probably good as it was a rough sea, honestly it was rough, my iPhone even fell off the table during the night and got lost somewhere under my bunk not to be found till the morning. Most inconvenient as I use it as a torch when I go to the loo during the night so that I won’t wake Steph up, yes I know I’m just so considerate!

The first port of call where we docked for long enough for us to get off the ship was Hammerfest at 11:15. The town is described as the worlds northernmost and has about 10,000 inhabitants. In the short time that we were there we managed to visit a couple of shops, a gallery where Steph managed rot find a nice Norwegian jumper that she took rather a licking to and is now being worn around…

View original 1,223 more words

Churchilla’s Chinchilla Commandos of Goya

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Originally from Wikipedia as Chinchilla.JPG wi...

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It was great to reacquaint with the Collie twins. Everybody was enjoying the moment, although we knew that a bruising battle lay ahead with Bri’s bane. We partied through the night, with a band of Beatles  starring in the Cavern, and then set off north the next morning.

Liaising with the Chinchilla Chinchillas

Emily and Brian led us through the secret cave for ten hours, until we at last reached the safe haven of Chinchilla. The Chinchilla chinchillas were also locked in a perennial struggle with Bri’s bane, and so we were warmly welcomed.

Emily and Brian introduced us all to the chinchilla leader, Pancho Churchilla, and he thanked us for our effort and support. When evening arrived, we all ascended into the fresh air, and basked in the Chinchilla sunset chinchilla style.

Chinchillas of Goya

We rested overnight underground in the burrow barracks of the Chinchillas of Goya (COG); a crack unit of chinchilla commandos that are the teeth of the chinchilla army sprocket.

They gave us their nests and slept on the floor, as their training had hardened them to such inconvenience. I didn’t like to take the nest, but we had been on a long hard journey; as long as the COG could maintain rotation without such self-maintenance.

Born to Bask

Someone had scrawled a message on the rock next to my nest that haunted my sleep that night. It said: Born to Bask, Live for Task.

It was signed CC, so I guess it must have been Cilla Chinchilla who wrote it; Pancho said she was the one who normally slept there. I thought it was a shame such a chilled chinchilla should have to live this way, and dreamt that one day soon the chinchillas would be able to once more bask in peace.

We were awoken at first light. After a short preparation we started on our final march to Bri’s bane. Nerves, excitement and fear all mixed together to activate anarchic adrenalin.


Capricho nº 50: Los Chinchillas de Goya, serie...

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For the Life of Brian

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Wombat

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I looked around at my travel companions, and they all nodded in unison. I had not doubted them. I told Emily we would be proud to join her in the battle of Bri’s bane.

She thanked us, before inviting us to join the crowd in the cavern. She told me she thought I’d recognise a few faces.

Meeting Old Friends

There were indeed some familiar faces. I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw Digger and Aussie, two of the first friends I made on the trip. After catching up with my old buddies I introduced them to Angry, Cathy and Elle; because I hadn’t even met them when I met ol’ Dig and Aus. It all seemed such a long time ago now, and strange to think that I had landed in Oz all alone.

I was just getting over the surprise of Dig and Aus when there was a tap on my shoulder. When I looked around it was yet another of my dear ol’ friends from early in the journey: the very venerable Vombatus Ursinus. It was great to see it looking swell. Vombat the Wombat joined our circle and soon got to know everybody and everything.

Mine’s a Large One

I was just about half way through telling Vombat about my journey when the walls started to rumble, and some rocks broke off. Everybody looked at the epicentre with anticipation, while beginning to take guard. I wondered if it was a bulldozing blitz by Bri’s bane.

A hole started to appear, and everybody tensed. As more rocks fell a paw emerged, and then the identity of the new arrivals was revealed. Why, it was none other than Colin and Ollie, the collie collier twins from Collie.

Life of Brian’s Bane below Brisbane

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Monty Python's Life of Brian

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We rushed into the cave, and hurtled through the narrow passages as if time was of the essence. My hat seemed to be getting stronger with every step, and provided enough glow for us to see clearly; it felt like I was wearing a green neon sign pointing ahead.

I started singing ‘Always look on the bright side of life…’ and the others quickly joined in.

Brian the Baggy Green

Then we turned a corner into a cavern complex. It was full of people, animals… and other objects. My hat suddenly flew off and headed straight for a baggy green hat. They met in mid-air, and embraced passionately.

We looked in awe, as the green reunion shone like a golden wonder.

Life of Brian’s Bane

When they returned to our level, my hat almost knocked me over without touching me, as it spoke for the first time.

It said, ‘Hello Grey, my name is Emily, the Emerald Hat. I am sorry I couldn’t talk to you before, but it would have been too dangerous for you. I had to wait until I was reunited with my other half, Brian the Baggy Green. It was foretold in historic hatlore that a greeny werewolf Halfling would survive a hat-trick of green tasks before reuniting the hats of hope here in the Emerald Beach cave. The union of green would lead to a top hat age of unpolluted peace and prosperity.’

I said, ‘It’s nice to talk, and it’s no problem about the previous lack of communication, but there is just one thing, for I am Grey.’

Emily seemed to smile, before asking me if I’d seen myself lately.

I looked down and was totally shocked to see that I was green all over. I had become green in the Emerald Cave without even realising it. It felt like a landmark moment, and I now felt confident I could achieve anything; just like I always think Green can. I felt like bouncing around the cave like a spring green.

However, Emily quickly brought me down to earth with a warning, ‘There are still great tests ahead, and we will require your services again if you want to remain with us. We are heading north to our destiny; a war to end all wars. For Brian it is the bane of his life. If you join us, I’m sure we can win this one last great battle, and all return to the lives we desire.’

Welcome to the Jungle: Emerald Forest Beach

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English: Putting Green, St Ives The green belo...

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As we drew closer to Emerald Beach I was growing ever more apprehensive.  My last few experiences of green hadn’t worked out very well.  There was our terrible meeting with Smiggin Holes, Lord of the Green; the green ray I’d seen before our awful Swan Lake experience; and then we couldn’t get past Green Point after been boomeranged from Boomerang Beach.

I thought Green would probably have had much better luck at those places, and maybe I just wasn’t cut out for this solo (originally) epic rambling lark.

Landing on Emerald Beach

My emerald cork hat almost dragged me onto Emerald Beach; it seemed to be growing in strength, and I now felt like it was wearing me more than the other way around!

When I took the hat off I saw it had become invisible apart from the corks.

Emerald Beach has a Deep Secret 

I put the hat back on and it pulled me towards a cliff framing the far side of the beach.  I looked back at the others, who followed and seemed to share my curiosity.

Out of the corner of my eye,
in the now seemingly distant ocean,
I thought I saw a commotion,
and wondered what it could be.

It was difficult making our way through all the emerald; like struggling through dense jungle.  But my hat was a good guide and we soon reached the cliff at the end of the beach.

The hat dragged me on, around the edge of the cliff, until I saw where it must be heading.  Emerald Beach had a secret cave.

Epic Poem Fantasy Travels New South Wales North Coast

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Shark Creek Bridge near Maclean, originally pa...

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We had a good night in Macquarie,
slept well without hearing snory,
had a filling breakfast first thing,
and then it was time to get going.

Hat Head

We travelled slower than the day before,
as our arms ached and heads were sore,
Hat Head was therefore a welcome break,
and my emerald cork hat seemed to wake.

Coffs Harbour

We were ready for a drink by Nambucca Heads,
but quickly left when offered four sambuca reds,
Coffs Harbour looked nice but sounded dangerous,
for those vulnerable to colds and viral illness.

Korora

Then my hat seemed to be dragging me on,
as if to a faraway land in a time once upon,
we raced the Pacific Highway to Korora,
even though it meant missing an aurora.

Moonee Beach

Moonee Beach flashed right past,
with my hat changing gear to very fast,
I didn’t know where we were going,
but the journey certainly wasn’t boring.

Emerald Beach

Then I saw the beach ahead was green,
I think it was the limiest I’d ever seen,
so I thought I knew what my hat was up to,
and felt it could be this journey’s breakthrough.