Grunge Rock Robot will try to Destroy Trash Metal Music

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The bench in Viretta Park has become a notable...

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We made it out of the alley, and found some cover in an old redundant building. I blended in well to the grey surroundings, but the others were too colourful to be dull.  As we caught our breath in the net of time, I asked Dizzy what on earth was going on.

No Place for Trash in the Grunge Decade

Dizzy said that while there had been a peaceful transition from trash metal to grunge rock in the real world, in the media world where Kerrang resides, conflict had built up.

As the 1990s wore on, and grunge lost its strength,  a small band of grungementalists wrote their own history of the decade.

They believed and espoused that Kurt Cobain would not have left them if trash metal hadn’t survived into the 1990s and made him miserable.

Of course, in reality Cobain had a lifetime of complex mental health issues, but the grungementalists did not want this to cloud their agenda, and so they focused on only one or two episodes of Kurt’s life.

The Making of Jeremy Grunginator

A shadow appeared at the warehouse entrance, and we readied ourselves for more death-defying excitement, but it turned out to be an old hobo who looked seasick the way he played his guitar.

I asked Dizzy what the grungementalists had to do with our current predicament, and he explained that they had worked through the night supping constant expressos in their coffee houses, until perfecting a Pearl Jam and a Percolator into the Instant Prosecutor Ten.

Dizzy said the IP10 was made Alive and because it had an amazingly Even Flow it was nicknamed Jeremy Grunginator.  It was then sent back to the 1980s to destroy trash metal, in the grungementalist belief that the 1990s would then be a better decade for Cobain and them.

It all made sense now, and no longer like literary nonsense at all.

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