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We rushed into the cave, and hurtled through the narrow passages as if time was of the essence. My hat seemed to be getting stronger with every step, and provided enough glow for us to see clearly; it felt like I was wearing a green neon sign pointing ahead.
I started singing ‘Always look on the bright side of life…’ and the others quickly joined in.
Brian the Baggy Green
Then we turned a corner into a cavern complex. It was full of people, animals… and other objects. My hat suddenly flew off and headed straight for a baggy green hat. They met in mid-air, and embraced passionately.
We looked in awe, as the green reunion shone like a golden wonder.
Life of Brian’s Bane
When they returned to our level, my hat almost knocked me over without touching me, as it spoke for the first time.
It said, ‘Hello Grey, my name is Emily, the Emerald Hat. I am sorry I couldn’t talk to you before, but it would have been too dangerous for you. I had to wait until I was reunited with my other half, Brian the Baggy Green. It was foretold in historic hatlore that a greeny werewolf Halfling would survive a hat-trick of green tasks before reuniting the hats of hope here in the Emerald Beach cave. The union of green would lead to a top hat age of unpolluted peace and prosperity.’
I said, ‘It’s nice to talk, and it’s no problem about the previous lack of communication, but there is just one thing, for I am Grey.’
Emily seemed to smile, before asking me if I’d seen myself lately.
I looked down and was totally shocked to see that I was green all over. I had become green in the Emerald Cave without even realising it. It felt like a landmark moment, and I now felt confident I could achieve anything; just like I always think Green can. I felt like bouncing around the cave like a spring green.
However, Emily quickly brought me down to earth with a warning, ‘There are still great tests ahead, and we will require your services again if you want to remain with us. We are heading north to our destiny; a war to end all wars. For Brian it is the bane of his life. If you join us, I’m sure we can win this one last great battle, and all return to the lives we desire.’